The first, I met in SLC while I was studying to earn my Associates degree. He was in my institute class, which if you don't know is like Bible study but we earned college credit since we attended and LDS school. He was tall with curly brown hair that hung down his head like a mop and had a wide smile below a pair of sparkling brown eyes.
I tried my hardest to find and empty seat next to him when we class together. On the days I did, my heart would pound in my chest and my palms would sweat profusely, but I was usually able to make small talk with him. I learned that he loved basketball. He talked about it a lot.
At work one day, the accounting team I was a part of was given tickets to the Utah Jazz basketball game. Not just any tickets-tickets for the company suite. It seemed like the planets were aligning and, after some coaxing from my roommates, I decided to invite Josh to the game. In the back seat of my roommate's car on the way to a Chinese dinner, I called him.
I got straight to the point and asked him if he would like to go to the Jazz game with me. He said no; he was leaving for a trip to Europe within the week and didn't think he would have time. Strike one.
I licked my wounds for a year or two before I asked another guy out. This time I was living in California and there was a suitable young man in my ward at church. Coincidentally, he also liked basketball and was a coach at a nearby high school. I crushed on this guy for a while before I asked him out, but finally called him while sitting in my car in the church parking lot. I asked if he wanted to have dinner sometime. His answer was, "No, I'm really busy with basketball season right now." Strike two. I licked my wounds even longer after that one.
Just over a year ago, every time I checked my Facebook I would notice that section titled PEOPLE YOU MIGHT KNOW. There was always a profile of one guy who caught my eye and every time I would look to see who our mutual friends were and try to figure out if we had ever met in person. I discovered that our mutual friends were people with whom I went to junior high and he went to high school with.
One day I decided to send a friend request to him just to see what would happen. He accepted! That ended up feeling lame…now we were friends on Facebook and nothing else. I discussed the situation with my best friend and her boyfriend at the time, who told me I should send him a message and ask if he want to meet. I was still apprehensive; I needed word for word instruction. My friend's boyfriend told me, "Give him a compliment and then see if he wants to meet up sometime. Don't beat around the bush. Get in and get out." Good advice.
So, standing in my best friends kitchen, I wrote a message. I apologized for being so forward, told him I thought he was handsome, then asked him if he was single and if he wanted to hang out. In and out.
He was such a sweetheart in his next message. He complimented me and told me he was flattered, but that he had just started dating someone and wanted to see where it went. Curse him for being so nice! He sent such a sweet reply that I had a hard time getting mad at him for rejecting me. I told him she was a lucky girl and went on my way. Strike three.
Just recently I reconnected with someone that I used to hang out with at church. I put myself out there and invited him to go hiking. He said yes (very enthusiastically, I might add). We had a great time visiting on a good two-hour hike but, sadly nothing ever came of it. I don't think he was interested the same way I was. Foul ball.
My impatience and frustration to find love continues to grow and corrupt me. Is there something wrong with me? Am I doing it wrong? I often feel like I'm banging my head against a wall. I have a constant ache in my heart.
I have accepted the challenge. I will not give up on love. I'm going to soldier on and hope there is someone looking for me just as diligently as I look for him. No stone will be left unturned.
Susan "You Mess With The Bull, You Get The Horns" B.
4 comments:
Did you ever know that you're my herooooo. You're everything I would like to beeeee!
Honestly, you are such an example to me. And oh my gosh, Josh!! I remember stories of him. Punk
I'm with Camille. You are doing it right. My comment regarding the basketball fanatics is you are the lucky one. A man that would say no to a beautiful, fun, interesting woman because of his love of basketball is an idiot and doesn't deserve to spend time with you. I'm sure Mr. Right is looking for you, too.
My husband's aunt didn't marry until she was 50. Everyone thought she had too high of expectations and that nobody would meet her needs (and she actually joked if she didn't meet someone by the age of 50 she was going to "do it" no matter what! Well she met a wonderful (rich I might add) man who had lost his wife to cancer and they are very very happy. Your prince charming is out there!
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